When a friend is grieving, you do not need to fix the pain or find perfect words. The kindest message is usually simple: acknowledge the loss, name your care, and offer one concrete form of support.
A simple first message
"I am so sorry. I do not have the right words, but I am thinking of you and I am here with you."
When you knew the person who died
"I keep thinking about your dad's kindness and the way he made everyone feel welcome. I am so sorry you are going through this."
Offering practical help
"I would like to bring dinner on Thursday, if that would help. You do not need to host or reply straight away."
Checking in later
"I have been thinking about you today. No need to answer, but I wanted you to know I am here whenever you want company or a quiet walk."
What to avoid
Try not to explain the loss away with phrases such as "everything happens for a reason." Staying present matters more. For help creating a gentle, personal note, use the condolences helper.